Read 50 Shades of Grey? Still having boring Sex? Here’s why…

Are you one of the 20 million women who have purchased 50 Shades of Grey?

Women all over the globe seem to be raving about this latest ‘mummy porn’. “It’s helped put the ‘life’ back into our sex life!” “Me and my husband are trying new and really naughty things!” and even “I have run the batteries flat on my vibrator!”.

Ok, so let me ask you another question…

How is your sex life, I mean really?

Because the overwhelming feeling i am getting from all these women is one of relief. Relief that the drudgery of their sex lives has been interrupted by this gasp-worthy and shock-tastic piece of erotic literature.

Why are 20 million women so unsatisfied with their sex lives?

Well its a good question! Obviously the initial attraction and excitement of wanting to rip your spouses clothes off at the beginning of a relationship naturally declines, but really – BDSM?! Surely there is a better alternative!

For some who don’t understand love, this decline in initial excitement is the beginning of the end – “The fire’s gone out of our relationship…” But wait! The alternative to BDSM is here!: If you grab the latest copy of Cosmopolitan or its equivalent, it will be able to tell you 101 ways how to “Spice up your love life!” (no joke, this is a serious suggestion from a hip and trendy woman’s mag…):

“…Dip into your kids’ toy chest, you paid for all those board games

— why not borrow them and play strip versions?…”

However, after about 5 seconds of reading these hilariously weak, stupid, embarrassing suggestions, one is left feeling a little um, uninspired. Can you imagine the excitement of Strip-Scrabble?! The unbridled eroticism of Strip-Hungry Hungry Hippos?! With Strip-Monopoly it would take over 2 hours before you even got your socks off!

The truth is of course that the poor misguided souls who read this rubbish believe that the initial feeling of sexual arousal/relationship excitement they felt at the beginning – that ‘fire’ – is the key to a happy and successful long-term relationship. So they spend years finding more and more bizarre 50 Shades-ish ways to ‘spice things up’, desperately trying to ward off that feeling of boredom that they dread so terribly.

Yes that’s right – you dread sexual boredom. After all, isn’t having ‘exciting’ sex the highest prize, the pinnacle of personal success in our pleasure-seeking, orgasm driven society?

Ok, I’m not going to claim to know the answer to everyone’s sexual dissatisfaction, but i do very much agree with one theory that is floating around out there…


I’m serious. And many other people are starting to wake up to this fact. Here are the facts as reported from 1Flesh – the fantastic new website giving us the truth about artificial contraception

For almost fifty years,  men and women have relied on contraception for liberated, satisfied sex lives, free from fear and unwanted consequence. And by and large, contraception has provided…for men. Women, on the other hand, are far more dissatisfied with their sex lives. Recent surveys found that 63% of married women would rather be watching a movie than having sex with their husbands, and, according to the 2010 National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior, only 64% of women report having an orgasm in their last sexual encounter.

It is entirely possible that part of women’s sexual dysfunction is the result of the birth control pill. A study published on May 4th, 2010 in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, reported that sexual functioning was negatively correlated with use of contraception in a study of over 1,000 German medical students. They reported both reduced sexual desire and arousal, indicating a potential link between contraceptive hormones and lack of sexual satisfaction. In an editorial published with the study, Dr. Irwin Goldstein of the Journal stated, “The irony is that these women are provided a medication that enables freedom from reproductive worries, but these same women are not provided information that there are significant adverse sexual effects that may ensue.”

The problem with hormonal contraception is that it increases estrogen (and sometimes progesterone) levels in a woman’s body, fooling it into acting as though pregnant in order to suppress ovulation. In an actual pregnancy, a woman’s sex drive is frequently reported to fluctuate dramatically, often increasing during the first trimester of pregnancy and tapering off during the second two, dropping off drastically postpartum. How these fluctuations are influenced by estrogen and androgen levels is poorly understood, and most will collectively blame “hormones.” But it is no secret that women typically experience dramatic changes in sex drive during the course of pregnancy.

It would be naïve, then, not to expect a similar change in sex drive with the use of hormonal contraception, which creates an ‘artificial pregnancy’, but involves none of the emotional and relational satisfaction that comes from a healthy pregnancy and anticipation of a child. We have put women in a medical situation that has no precedent in our experience. In short, hormonal birth control’s effect on a woman’s sexual satisfaction is a possible detriment, and needs to be studied as such.

The study of German medical students cited earlier in this article is so important because thus far, it is one of a kind. In the 50 years  in which hormonal contraception has been legal, there has been virtually no reliable research conducted to determine if contraception is really meeting one of its goals: allowing women to be sexually satisfied. In granting women sexual “liberty”, they could be physically cheapening a woman’s ability to be satisfied sexually. The scientific community responsible for reproductive health must critically reevaluate if their current agendas for hormonal contraception are based on women’s best interests.

Please visit for more info, and lets start the revolution ‘Bringing Sexy Back’!

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3 thoughts on “Read 50 Shades of Grey? Still having boring Sex? Here’s why…

    • Ha! Ha! Bondage and Sadomasochism. Recieving and inflicting pain in a sexual way. Not very nice stuff.

  1. What many women don’t get is that 50 Shades of Grey is a chronicle of child abuse. I haven’t and will not read the entire book. I’ve read enough to know, the female character has a child’s mind and the male character acts to “groom” the child to accept abuse. Just reading excerpts makes me ill. Thanks for a post that I hope will convince some women not to “spice up their marriages” with this sort of trash. Drusilla

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